Ve Didn't Know Der Sockses (und Der Clockses) Vas Loaded!

To prove he's not an English spy, Bob Hope, Time-Traveller, has agreed to help General George Washington in his sneak attack on the Prussian camp December 26, 1776.

Since there was already a Santa Claus onsite, he pulled his fake beard over his head to become - voila! - MISSUS Santa Claus, the better to deliver Washington's booby-trapped cuckoo clock.

But then the Prussian Santa wants to get frisky!

After a little bait-and-box, Bob and Harvard get out of there, just in time.

And THEN they find out that the oarsman who pulled them out of the Potomac is the elusive Nigel Wednesday.  Of course he doesn't have the Golden Gazelle, this story's MacGuffin, in his backpack; he left it at home.

So how a lowly American Revolutionary War soldier came across a treasure from Cleopatra, we don't know.  But instead of investigating the discovery of cottage cheese, it's off to Actium in 31 BC.

See you at week's end for our next leap backwards in time.