Our hero Bob Hope, in his quest to find the Golden Gazelle, has gone back in time to December 26, 1776, because one of George Washington's men is Nigel Wednesday, its last known possessor.
Having arrived by falling into the Potomac, they must convince General Washington that they aren't Prussian spies. So, they undertake a little mission . . .
Don't ask (or tell) if 18th-century tenchnology could contrive a time bomb that would fit into a leetle-bitty old alarm clock. We'll just handwave it and blame it on the Steampunkers.
Problem is, there's already a Santa in the Hessian camp! So, it's off to the gender-bender closet, and voila! Instant MISSUS SANTA CLAUS.
The only problem with that is, MISTER Claus wants to get a little frisky. Time for Rocky and Bullwinkle to save the day!
Oops, that was a commercial. Anyway, we'll see the next page or three Monday or Tuesday. Until then, Bob must endure Santa's schnapps breath!