Action #305: What Part of "I Hate Supergirl" Don't They Understand?

Linda Lee Danvers spotted a local girl going over the falls in her canoe, and rescued her.  But instead of saying "Thanks," Karen Blair says she'd rather die than be helped by Supergirl.

Why?  Obviously, Karen lashed out from a feeling of inferiority, "some sort of girlish jealousy," Supergirl figures.

Coincidentally, this is Supergirl Week in Midvale, celebrating the anniversary of her arrival on Earth.  Linda and her adoptive mom, Edna Danvers, find that downtown is so crowded, they can't get a good parking space. 

(By the way, Mrs Danvers's car, as depicted, is a small-to-midsize car, for the times.)

However, let's be honest -- doesn't Linda's trick cause as many problems as it solves?  I mean, how're they going to get the car OUT of this space without MORE super-shenanigans?  And what about the traffic cameras?  Won't they catch this little lagniappe? 

Oh, yeah -- this is 1963.  No cameras.

Anyway, in the local grocery store, they're giving away Supergirl statuettes with every $5 purchase.  Back then, folks, you got A WHOLE SACK OF GROCERIES for five dollars.

The part about "all profits go to the orphanage" seems wonky.  They're giving away something extra.  How does this generate a profit?

In the bottom panel, we see more evidence that the creators of the comics were of a previous generation than the readers.  "She's my ideal!" the little girl squeals about her statuette.

This is a reference to a song from Maurice Chevalier's 1930 movie Playboy of Paris. "She's My Ideal" remained in the popular songbook, played in the 1940s by Glenn Miller and recorded in 1955 by Bing Crosby. 


In the final panel of the page, we see racial tension rear its ugly head, in Karen's ethnic slur about giants from Poland.

Poor Supergirl!  Like me, she can't understand why everybody doesn't love her!  What's not to love?

Not Supergirl's honesty, to be sure.  In a bit of ballot-rigging, Supergirl cheats and draws Karen's name from a big basket of entries for a super-flight tour of the area.  How many children or adults had their hearts crushed when Supergirl ignored each of them?

You'll note that Karen hates the Maid of Might, yet she still showed up at this ceremony.  And she's so upset when her name is called that she dashes for the PASSENGER SIDE of her car.  Does she think she can get away faster by opening the wrong door and sliding across the seat?

Tune in Monday and you won't find out!  But you WILL get the next couple of pages in this Silver Age saga of angst, tragedy, and -- perhaps -- reconciliation.

 

Action #305: The Girl Who Hated Supergirl!

'The Girl Who Hated Supergirl!" appeared as the second story in October, 1963's Action Comics.  The script was by Leo Dorfman.  This tale established a canonical date for Supergirl's arrival on Earth: May 18.

This story's splash panel demonstrates the kind of chronal vacuum present in many comics stories.  Supergirl/Linda Danvers's hometown, Midvale,  is a typical small town, in which "everyone else" is Supergirl's friend.  So, shouldn't these two people (three if you count Secret Identities) have crossed paths before?

The story begins with a pastoral scene in which Linda (Supergirl)  Dancers and her boyfriend Dick Malverne are riding through the sward (like Dennis Moore), when Super-vision sees a girl in a canoe about to take a tumble.

A little augmented equestrian jump over a hedge, and Linda Lee Danvers is free to switch to Supergirl and rescue the girl.

Only problem is, Karen Blair freaks out at the sight of Supergirl.  She evidently would rather have taken her chances on the rapids than accept aid from the Maid of Might.  Why?

Come back Friday to begin unraveling this psychological mystery!

Happy Birthday, Supoerman! -- Action #305: Filler

Yes, it was established in a 1967 comic that Superman's birthday (not Clark Kent's) was to be celebrated on February 29, Leap Day.   Here's an article about it.

Today's page-by-pages from October, 1963's Action Comics #305 Come just past the staple -- we're halfway through!

I guess these ads might have been effective in shilling the poor kids of their allowances -- these come-ons were seen every month in a wide range of titles.  If I had to guess, I'd venture that the planes were probably the outlines or line drawings of aircraft, maybe printed on a square card or rounded bit of pressboard like a milk-cap insert.

And who would want a bunch of old stamps, anyway, where there were bubble-gum monster cards to be had, and marbles to be played?

Now, I do have this Flash Annual, but it doesn't count since I bought it only twenty years ago or so.  Do you suppose very many kids actually pinned up the portrait of the Flash?

See you on Wednesday, when we'll start the second story in this issue, "The Girl Who Hated Supergirl!"

Action #305: Between the Stories

Meanwhile, messages from our sponsors.

I always considered these ads, but never followed through on subscribing.  Heck, I bet my folks would have GIVEN me the money for a subscription!  Have you ever seen a comic book in somebody else's stack that has an apparent white vertical crease down the center?  It's my understanding that the subscription comics were folded in half to mail.  Thease creased copies wer subscription copies.

I always love reading the letters in the letter columns,  I'd wonder why I hadn't thought of this objection, or that bit of inconsistency.  I also enjoy cringing (now as then) to the atrocious attempts at humorous ripostes by the editorial staff.

These letters are a typical mix of praise and finger-pointing.  The letter from Harvard students is the kind of letter you'd see several times a year.  Sometimes a bunch of guys from an Army post overseas would write; sometimes it was a couple of girls in an advanced high-schoool math class.

But the effect was all the same:  We're smart/important/substantial types, and we read DC Comics.  So take heart if your big brother or parents or the older kids at school tease you about reading them.  They have redeeming social value!

If I could only say that about myself, dear readers!  See you Monday.

Action #305: Sippin' Nitro, Burpin' Trouble!

Here are the last two pages from "Why Superman Needs a Secret Identity!" from October 1963.

Superman has lost his Clark Kent identity during the rescue of his friends from a mad bomber.  He tries a different street name, but his new persona doesn't have a history.  He can't provide information about previous employers, or a childhood he didn't have.  What's left?

How humiliating!  The Man of Steel forced to become a bum on Skid Row, because there's nowhere else to turn.  Then he's run in for vagrancy!  Sheesh!

I have two comments about this sorry sequence of affairs:

The cop that runs Superman in looks like a self-portrait by artist Curt Swan!  LEFT IMAGE:  Close-up of cop.  MIDDLE IMAGE: Photo of Swan.  RIGHT IMAGE:  Swan self-portrait from 1983.

Secondly:  In this story the fictional character Superman is a wonderful type of how a true hero might act.  His only concern is for the people he serves.  His saving mission is not only worth casting his own identity aside to save them, he's also willing to live among them as their apparent equal.  Not only that, he doesn't turn up his nose at living with the bums and cast-outs, if that keeps him near to the people he has sworn to serve.

Hmmm .... what other true-life hero might this also describe?  HINT: He is risen.

In this story, our hero has a brainstorm and figures out one way to neutralize the liquid nitro -- by taking out of its danger zone!  He quickly converts a glass test tube to a kind of super-straw ...

... and while all eyes are on the clock for the end of Benny the Blaster's countdown, Clark ever-so-carefully actually SIPS THE NITRO from the flask into his super-stomach.

Quick!  When can you see Clark Kent burp?  Why here, of course!  *excuse me* -- It must have been something I ate!

Then we get to see a rare example of Clark Kent nabbing a bad guy.  In the final panel of this fine tale of alternative choices, Perry reclines in his Isolation Ward hospital bed reading the headline nobody expected to see:  CLARK KENT CAPTURES MAD BOMBER.  When Perry says, "Of course you were never in any danger," he's referring to Benny's vial, which evidently didn't contain nitro -- after all, it didn't explode.

Of course, unknown to Perry and Jimmy but known to us, Clark Kent's physical safety wasn't being threatened, even by the REAL NITROGLYCERIN.  No, it was the security of the Kent persona  that was threatened.  And after these examples of what could happen to Superman without Clark Kent, we can only say, "Whew!" and be glad for that ol' staple of the Silver Age, bulletproof continuity.

Perhaps one day we will check later issue's letter columns for any readers' comments about this story.  In the final panel, such comments are invited.

The bottom half of this page is an ad for Tootsie Rolls.  To me, the tongue-twister is rather lame.  I prefer the one that goes, "I'm a mother-pheasant plucker, I pluck mother pheasants.  I'm the pleasantest mother-pheasant plucker whoever plucked a mother pheasant."

Believe it or not, I can reel THAT ONE off pretty fast!

See you on Friday for some of the middle pages of this wonderful comic from DC's Silver Age.

 

Action #305: Superman's Secret Identity Is Blown!

This tale from October 1963 riffs on the necessities of our hero's Secret Identity.  The springboard is a visit by Clark and Jimmy to Perry White in the hospital, where he's in Isolation for measles.  However, at this same time, Benny the Blaster has decided to stick up the hospital for its radium supply.

Is there any way that Clark (Superman) Kent can save his friends and still save his secret persona?  Here's one answer:

Oh, great! [sarcasm]  The day is saved, by the nitro blowing the lid off of Superman's secret.  But Perry White's suggestion, while forthright, seems too simplistic to be true:  Just get another identity!

So, our hero figures that he can try fighting crime in both identities,  and applies as "Mark Trent" to the Metropolis PD.

While I understand the dramatic reason for this sequence of events, it doesn't make sense that a candidate would perform all the physical tests before filling out the basic application paperwork.  Also, you can tell that Superman doesn't really care if people get a taste of his superhuman capabilities.

BTW, the right-hand panel in the top row is not all that improbable.  When a couple of months ago, my son went under the knife for "a minor procedure," the anesthesiologist broke the first needle trying to hook up my son's tranks.  I knew I had a super kid, but really!!

If you take the final panel and multiply it by about fifty gajillion, you can get an idea of how hard this kind of story point would be hard to live out in today's real life.  Considering the amount of documentation accumulated nowadays by transactions from smartphones to frequent-buyer clubs, somebody with no backstory would be exiled to the fringes of employability pretty fast.

Besides, The Donald would impugn his citizenship!

Please check back on Wednesday for the end of this great "What-If?" story.

 

Action #305: That darn Ol' Stockroom Mirror!

OCTOBER, 1963:  This is the last page of this mini-vignette that ruminates on Superman's need for a Secret Identity.

After Jimmy Olsen, meaning no harm, lets it slip to his Fan Club that Superman's civilian identity is one of his acquaintances, a criminal eavesdropper passes the info to a crook, who replaces a convenient Daily Planet stockroom mirror with a special lead-lined one-way glass.

Sure enough, in the scene also captured by this issue's cover, they witness Clark Kent in the act of transforming from Superman.

Then, the jerks pull the ol' switcheroo and swap out an honorary key-to-the-city with a duplicate made of Gold Kryptonite.

It's a sign of the 1963 era:  The astronaut is being honored for CIRCLING THE EARTH FOR A WEEK.  In years to come, that would be thin beer.  After all, don't those guys in the "International Space station" do the same?  The difference is, THEY AREN'T PLANNING TO GO FARTHER ANY MORE.

So, Superman is rudely informed that his powers have been stolen.  And his poor well-intentioned pal Jimmy is to blame.  What a bummer!

Compare Kal-El's final words on this page with later practice in most comics, regarding a Secret Identity.  "No one in the world could keep a secret like that!"   A statement more honored in the breach, eh?

See you Monday with the continuation of this story.

 

Action #305: Loose Lips May Sink Kryptonians

OCTOBER, 1963:  In our next vision of what Superman's life might have been like with his Secret Identity in jeopardy, we start over with Clark Kent arriving in Metropolis for the first time, still with an intact super alter-ego.  Think of it as an updated take on 1938, Action #1, and the first Superman story.   Only with a narrower focus.  And no Senator Barrows.  And no bouncing a bad guy's car off a cliff.  And no  .... NEVER MIND, JUST READ.

Yep, I agree that it is kind of attention-grabbing to see a photo of Superman hoisting a Green K rock.  (You might have a similar shocking effect with a photo of the President saluting a copy of the Constitution.)

Soon Clark is in the swing of the reporter's life, having made some swell work friends like Jimmy Olsen and that Lane girl.  But, with any sort of personal connection comes ... risks ...

You know, this first panel makes you wonder.  Hasn't Superman ever heard of LOCKING THE DOOR?

And the remainder of this page's events, while entertaining, remain similarly jarring -- though they make for a GREAT comic-book story.

It's not so out-of-bounds that a random janitor-type might overhear Jimmy being human and bragging about his Super-buddy.  That's his second job.  Of course, this implies that Steve Barnes, the master con man, must have pretty deep pockets.  The implication is that Barnes probably has spies in Lois's brunch group, Clark's favorite cafe, and Perry's country club ...

No, it just makes you wonder why the Super-brain of Clark (Superman) Kent doesn't wonder why there's a new window IN AN INTERIOR WALL.  Oh -- it's not a window -- Barnes swapped out a "normal mirror."  Now we wonder, what newspaper stockroom features a four-by-four-foot mirror.

The page's last panel is a condensation of our cover scene.  Unlike some other DC tales, this story does not simply shrink down the original cover art -- it's the same scene but re-drawn.

OK, thanks to Jimmy Olsen's desire to associate himself with greatness, we have the stage set for a dreadful outcome.  Now that these schmoes know that Superman is Clark Kent, what will happen next?

Come back Friday to find out!

 

Action #305: It's Lonely at the Top

In this Imaginary Tale-within-a-Real-Tale from October 1963, Superman has decided to forego a Secret Identity.  In the previous pages of this conjectural timeline, he lost his parents to a vengeful crook.  Having moved to Metropolis in the present day, he's constantly pestered by us mortal-types who want a selfie with the Great One.

It turns out that random door-knocks in the night aren't the ONLY downside of being Superman and having your address in the phone book.  Certain enemies might come calling ...

Sure enough, hometown nemesis Lex Luthor sets up on a roof across the street and does a little skeet-shooting with Kryptonite. (Sounds like a punk band, huh?)

Next thing you know, the President is gently asking Supes to please take his crime-magnet self out of Metropolis.  When our good ol' Prez tells you to hit the road,  that's serious stuff, campers.

Here, in this final page of today's excerpt, we get a glimpse of the same mental funk that Alan Moore tapped into for Adrian Veidt in Watchmen.  Our Superman is isolated, watching the world at a remove (sorta like Doc Manhattan too!)

Having had very lonely times in my life (haven't you?), I know what it's like to play hours of solitaire, desperate for a friend or congenial face.  You do indeed feel like the loneliest man in the world.

Taking the Watchmen allegory a bit farther, what makes Superman different from the social outcasts depicted in the Moore/Gibbons tale?  Probably his childhood, raised and socialized by a loving family.  He feels a part of the world, not a giant bestriding a planet of ants.

That empathy and humility, my friends, are at the core of compassionate heroes.  That's truly what we want when we cry "Save me!"

Think deeply on our need for rescue, and I'll see you Wednesday with the next few pages from our story.

 

Action #305: Continuing Our "What If?" Tale

In our meditations from October 1963 on the necessity of a Secret Identity for the Man of Steel, our flashback has shown us that the proud Kents have encouraged Kal-El to reveal to the world that he's been masquerading as Clark Kent these dozen years or so, on Earth.

Now that his Identity is known to the world, he doesn't have to hide any more ...

Superboy attends school (what a silly idea, with HIS Super-brain!) and easily gets a pass to perform rescues.  Isn't it a nice touch to orient Superboy in the "old days" by having him rescue a derigible?

But with his personal secret out, his parents the Kents are in mortal danger from a lug who wants revenge ...

I don't know about you, but these brief panels depicting Superboy's confusion and loss certainly resonated with my pre-teen self.  What would happen if MY PARENTS were suddenly taken from me?  Especially if in some ways IT WAS MY FAULT -- I was the one who put them into danger?

The last panel on the page, showing Superboy mourning the loss of his parents' lives at their graves, is a sombre one for me.

 Well, by the time of this "current-day" Super-tale, the Kents have indeed passed "in the real world," too.  Superman has no family to defend.  What if he moved to Metropolis as an adult, with no secret identity?  The next couple of pages lay out one chain of events ...

Lots of publicity ... the inane kind that gets in his way.  Superman is constantly under public scrutiny by his adoring public.  People knock on his door day and night.  Rescuing parakeets, for gosh' sakes!  That's no way for a BNS (Big Name Superhero) to live!

On the other hand, don't you imagine that the property values in the neighborhood of the Superman Arms probably took off like a bird or a plane?

On Monday we'll continue this page-by-page comic-book survey, and follow this alternate-time thought experiment.

See you then!
 

Action #305: As We Begin Our First Story

"Why Superman Needs a Secret Identity!", from Action Comics #305 (October 1963), was written by Leo Dorfman.  Pencils by Curt Swan, inks by George Klein.

This story is full of sobering twists, but begins with a bellylaugh.  Perry White's got the measles, and he's confined to a hospital for a few days!  Clark and Jimmy are on their way to get some work instructions, when they take a wrong turn on the way to Perry's room in the Isolation Ward and interrupt a weird kind of robbery.

Benny the Blaster is famous for strong-arm robberies by way of a little bottle of what he announces is nitroglycerin.  As we children of the 1960s knew, all you had to do was look cross-eyed at nitro, and it would go off!  (Kind of like your big sister.)

Benny wants the valuable radium in the hospital's safe (used for radiation therapy).  He starts his countdown, and Clark has one minute to either abandon his Secret Identity and dash in as Superman to rescue the others, or .... be vewwy, vewwy snee-ee-eaky, as Elmer Fudd might say.

The last panel of the page is a great one, as it visually illustrates the great "split" between the mild-mannered reporter and the mighty Superman. 

Let's use a branching form of Alternate History to explore what might happen if, through various scenarios, Clark Kent is known to be the Guy from Krypton.

In the first page of our opening salvo, Superboy thwarts a bank robbery inventively, inspiring Martha and Jonathan Kent to proudly tell the world that their son is Superboy.

Aren't these brief snippets of human interaction great?  Lana teasing "fraidy-cat" Clark, the Kents telling their son how proud they are of him, and so on.


Stay tuned for Friday's continuation of this great story.  Would everything have come up roses if a Strange Twist of Fate (TM) had revealed Clark Kent as Superboy in Smallville?

See you then!
 

Page-by-Page Through Action #305

This wonderful comic book is cover-dated October, 1963.  As we pass through its pages we'll be having an everyday experience.  Comic books had an average paid circulation of over 240,000 issues, and kids were learning through the world around them about right and wrong, good guys and bad guys.

What greater good guy could there be, than Superman?

 Another great, evocative piece of cover art by the great Curt Swan.  You can tell that the three guys in the foreground are crooks.  Number One is using a decadent SOLID GOLD ZIPPO to light up.  Guy Number Two is waving around a valise full of greenbacks.  And Number Three is waving around Gold Kryptonite, one of those harmful isotopes from Superman's home planet.  This stuff can remove a Kryptonian's powers permanently, leaving them subject to revenge attacks from the scores of evildoers they've jailed.

Just now, while bloviating, I noticed an anomaly on this cover.  WHERE IS THE PRICE?  There should be "12¢" somewhere across the top of the page.

The text for this page sets out to examine what is a received truth for DC's superheroes.  Everybody knows why a Secret Identity is needed!  It's too, umm -- I mean, to make sure that, well, ummm ....

I guess we'll read the story and see!

This public service announcement covers some topics of outdoor life that should be common sense, but often forgotten, such as the fisherman in the middle row, who took off without any way to find the path back to his campsite.  You laugh at semi-literal babes-in-the-woods behavior like this.  You tell yourself YOU would have more common sense than this ... until you go outside in the morning to your car ... only it's been stoel out of your driveway, because you LIKE A MORON left it runnig with the key in it, to warm up.

Our splash page heralds the arrival of another great story by Leo Dorfman, visualized by penciler Curt Swan and (possibly) inker George Klein.

The terraces of frightened onlookers were appropriated for my portmanteau art for October 2015's Blog-o-Ween.

Lex Luthor, while hating Superman, is also an astute student of pop culture, given that he quotes Jackie Gleason's signature line, "How Sweet It Is!" which Gleason first introduced earlier this same year in the film Papa's Delicate Condition.

Join us Wednesday for a few pages that begin this story, as we travel page-by-page through a wonderful bit of American life from the bright side of the 1960s.
 

MA-82 - Joy and Noise, Disc 5

Here's another collection of songs that inspire me to laugh, pray, and be thankful.  Many from the 1990s, a few from earlier.  You'd be happier if you looked up the performers and invested in more of their work!

01. Here We Go - Grits (3:20)

02. You're Not Alone - Marie Miller (3:21)

03. Press On - Building 429 (2:49)

04. Endure - Plumb (3:50)

05. No Restricted Signs (Up in Heaven) - Golden Gate Quartet (2:59)

06. Solid Rock - Daniel's Window (3:38)

07. Good Morning - Mandisa (featuring TobyMac) (3:25)

08. You Carry Me - Moriah Peters (3:03)

09. 12 Round Knockout - KJ-52 (3:58)

10. The Kirby Man - Layton Howerton (4:22)

11. Because You Loved Me - Say-So (5:06)

12. Alive - P O D (3:24)

13. Beautiful Day - Jamie Grace (3:12)

14. Keep on Rhymin' - Emcee One (3:50)

15. Princes and Frogs (Underdog Mix) - Superchick (3:05)

16. Unveiled Faces - Sarah Masen (4:19)

17. Speak to the Hand - Lakita (3:48)

18. What If I Stumble? - dc Talk (5:05)

19. The Way That You Are - Miranda (4:03)

20. Here Comes the Sun - Mayfair Laundry (2:48)

21. Skip to the End - Mukala (3:44)

https://www.filefactory.com/file/5ae7d6ne1702/MA-82.rar

 

See you Monday for a new page-by-page through a wonderful DC title from the 1960s.

 

I've got a New PARD -- First Hand

Thanks to my work for Jacobs/Brown Press, I'm now the owner of a laptop to use in editing.

His name is PARD, for Pretty Awesome 'Ritin' Device.  As I (typically) wondered how to scar PARD forever with an imprint of my own personality, I decided to personalize the desktop background image as a deck of 52 cards. 

The image on each card would be of something I like, from childhood to today.

Here is Hand 1.

Surely you can name them all!

See you Thursday.

MA-50 - 45s & Favorites, Disc 7 -- More Pop Music Miscellany

More proof in the wonderful cornucopia that USE TO BE pop music, before rhythms replaced melody and thought, not focus groups, produced lyrics.

Not that dreck wasn't marketed in the days of AM radio -- Sturgeon's Law is a reality of the universe -- but "way back then," even dreck was conceived and produced through a system that allowed more human fingers on every step of the process.  The human touch sometimes ennobles the basest products of work-for-hire:  Sistine Chapel, anyone?

1 -       Birthday      The Beatles / Beatles Remixers Group   (4:17)

2 -      A Song for You      Leon Russell   (4:04)

3 -      Mother Freedom      Bread   (2:33)

4 -      Wake Up Sunshine     Chicago       (2:34)

5 -      Up on Cripple Creek (live)     The Band   (4:39)

6 -       Superstar    Bette Midler (5:09)

7 - Goodbye to Love Carpenters (3:50)

8 - Smoke on the Water    Deep Purple (3:44)

9 - Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters   Elton John (4:57)

10 - How Do You Do Mouth & MacNeal (3:12)

11 - Deteriorata National Lampoon (4:25)

12 - I Love Every Little Thing About You Stevie Wonder (3:53)

13 - The Circle Game (live) Joni Mitchell (6:24)

14 - Pinball Wizard Elton John (5:12)

15 - Dog & Butterfly Heart (5:05)

16 - We Belong Together Rickie Lee Jones    (4:58)

17 - A Life of Illusion   Joe Walsh (3:28)

18 - Come Together The Beatles / Beatles Remixers Group (4:02)

The first and last tracks are wonderful alternate mashup/rearrangements of Beatles standards, making them (in the words of Dickens) "Recalled to Life."

Track 11 was conceived by the National Lampoon guys in response to the cheesy success of "The Desiderata" as a an example of the shallow public seeking non-condemnatory "deep thoughts."  Lyrics to both are given here.

You are a fluke of the universe.

See you Monday, fellow fluke!